Spring is the time of plans and projects

Tolstoy QuoteThank you, Leo Tolstoy for such a wonderful quote to use as my blog title today. Which I’ve taken from Anna Karenina (a must read, please don’t base your opinion on that meat-grinder of a movie recently made).

Despite everything which is going on for me with regards to my mental health and within my family I’ve tried to be determined to keep my head above water as much as possible. Helped today by a beautiful blue sky and warm sunshine I decided keeping busy was the best policy I had for tackling my demons.

Starting with some window cleaning, I moved on to cleaning the car, which was much more of an effort than it would sound. I’ve owned the car for two years and never cleaned it. I’m fairly sure my neighbours think I have a new car now! Ah well, should help if I have to sell it…I have a feeling I may lose my licence, I have to wait and see how this meeting with the psychiatrist goes but it’s certainly a likelihood.

Each of the friends I mentioned on my post a few days ago has been in touch with me separately, all reminding me that it doesn’t matter we live miles away and that it’s the friendship itself that matters not where you live. This is why I consider them my closest friends because they always know what to say to make me feel less alone.

This afternoon my Husband took my out on his bike, He had a few errands to run so we rode around and I played Ingress whenever we stopped for him to go do his errands. I’d like to have said we were riding around with the wind in our hair but helmet laws and all that! But that reckless Bipolar Manic in me really wanted to rip that helmet off!

The voices have been pretty loud all day, but keeping busy has helped me function regardless of them. I’m on my own tomorrow so I think that’s going to be tough going, especially as I no longer have my Mum to fall back on. But hopefully the weather will be good again and I can go play some Ingress, I’ve done a bit of tactical planning so I know where I will going if I do get out so fingers crossed.

For now I think I have to take each minute as it comes and limit my plans and projects to what is realistically achievable!


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