I have a friend who is by far the most positive person I have ever known, she has the ability to will herself into a positive state of mind, of course it’s taken years of practice with meditation and much concentration but it’s such a wonderful thing to learn about.
I feel it’s worth saying that this friend isn’t someone who’s had an easy life, it’s always easy to assume that people in this situation have done and don’t understand the pains of others. This isn’t the case with my friend, she understands the curve balls life and health can throw at you as well as anybody else, she is just able to shake off negative thoughts and bring about a positive outlook, and as a result she lives a very happy life filled with the things she enjoys doing.
I sometimes think the British way of life is engineered for unhappiness, it’s as if we are set up to fail. Everything in this country is focused on money, even living a basic life, as I do, money becomes a focal point because there is barely enough to pay rent and buy food. Being positive when there is stress like this weighing down is really difficult.
I also find it difficult focussing on meditation, my friend has sent me meditations, and given me advice on what to do but I just can’t get myself to relax enough. I find there is always something going on in my head that distracts me and puts me into a more stressed out state. It’s a bit like the one time I tried yoga, I did completely the opposite from relaxing and got really anxious and panicky.
I’ve started to try my own ways of looking for positivity, ways that work for me, so that I’m not always weighed down in negativity. There are two things which have really worked for me so far:
- The first is that I write down a few things each night which have been good that day, or I’m looking forward to the next day. In the morning, when I’m often quite depressed, regardless how the day pans out I usually wake up feeling quite depressed. Reading through my list each morning, helps me shake it off and get out of bed. At least that is then part one of the day dealt with! Only another 12 or so hours to deal with!
- The other thing that I’ve found helpful is to start focusing on music I like again, I’ve been listening to it more than I have in a while, listening to it when I’m walking and trying to remember how happy it can make me. Music has fulfilled me for much of my life, but when I’m suffering I often forget that and get sucked into the mood cycle I’m living.
Ensuring that I remind myself of things I have to be positive about helps. I’m not so good at keeping calm, meditative, and quiet, but I can remind myself of what there is in my life worth being positive about, and maybe I can one day be even half as positive as my friend!