While I was recently recovering from my surgery I decided I was ready to start working again, huge decision and one I have to be careful to step into without setting my wellbeing back. I decided to try my hand at some freelancing again, that would fit with the volunteer work I do well and I could manage the work flow and what work I was doing.
Then earlier this week I saw a job that just called to me, it literally wouldn’t let me go, I kept going back to it and thinking “I can do that” no more that I was thinking “I would be perfect for that” it’s with the charity I volunteer for already but working with one of their recovery teams as a peer support worker specifically with young people experiencing psychosis for the first time. Qualifications for the role are experience of psychosis and drug misuse.
So yesterday I filled in the application, I started off feeling positive and sure of myself, then the further through the application I got the more sure I was that I was making a mistake. They run their application through competency based scoring and quite a lot of their essential competencies I hit very wide of the mark. Which knocked my confidence through a loop and left me realising this is a hopeless endeavour.
So now I have a completed application sat on my laptop and I’m too afraid to send it. So that went well.